“This is every cook’s opinion –
no savory dish without an onion,
but lest your kissing should be spoiled your onions must be fully boiled.”
-Jonathan Swift
Everyone has different experiences that make them realize they’re officially old… For some it’s getting married, or having a baby, or getting into a graduate program (which I also just did *toot toot* <– my horn); for me, it was when I started having to Google the abbreviations that everyone was using on social media.
NOTE: THERE IS NO POISON IN THIS DRESSING, IT WAS JUST A HILARIOUS WIZARD OF OZ REFERENCE
I honestly believe that everybody, at one time or another, has entertained delusions of grandeur…
“What puts the “ape” in apricot? What have they got that I ain’t got?”
-The Cowardly Lion, The Wizard of Oz
if you’re anything like me, after watching The Truman Show, you thought twice about everything you did–even in private–just in case you were secretly being filmed as part of a twisted reality series. Aaand if you’re anything like me, this paranoia lasted far longer than it should have. There are still some days that I wish my life was more like a sitcom- I’d have a theme song that would get stuck in your head for days, an adoring live studio-audience and best of all, my witty one-liners would not only be heard and appreciated, but broadcast nation-wide. Continue reading “And Now My Beauties, Something With Poison In It: Poppy(seeds)”
This is every cook’s opinion –
no savory dish without an onion,
but lest your kissing should be spoiled
your onions must be fully boiled.
-Jonathan Swift
French Onion Soup with Sourdough Crouton and Gruyere Cheese
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_ _ It’s the small victories that make me the happiest– perhaps because not many “big” victories have come my way– but I choose to think that I simply appreciate the subtleties in life. For example, I spent 10 minutes this afternoon trying to pry the cap off my lipgloss, finally resorting to using the knife on a wine screw, and I rejoiced riotously (ok, with a silent fist pump… I was at work and I don’t want to talk about why I have a wine screw in my purse) when it finally came flying off. I celebrate when a person trying to pass in the right lane gets cut off and has to drop back; I’m delighted when the song I want to illegally download is on Limewire and doesn’t turn out to be an automated recording reprimanding me for pirating music; and I’m on cloud nine when a recipe that I try ends up being a delicious meal. I give you: slow cooker french onion soup!
“There were ruddy, brown-faced, broad-girthed Spanish Onions, shining in the fatness of their growth like Spanish Friars, and winking from their shelves in wanton slyness at the girls as they went by, and glanced demurely at the hung-up mistletoe.”
-Charles Dickens, A Christmas Carol
Jalapeno Popper Grilled Cheese
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_ _ For about a year, I was employed at a club in Boston, during which time I was gifted many life lessons by simply watching the patrons- the most important of which is that drunk people are creepy, and absolutely LOVE the Eddie Money song “Take Me Home Tonight.” The real benefit of spending so much time in this ridiculous environment is that I can now drop some pretty awesome name-bombs: I got to watch Paris Hilton make a fool of herself lip syncing on stage; I ran straight into Sir David Ortiz lurking in a dark corner and nodded like an imbecile pretending that I could understand the words coming out of his mouth; but most importantly, I danced with Wes Welker and realized that off the field, not a single person knew who he was… GO PATS! As football season is heating up, despite not having my boy-o around to make me actually watch this season, I’ve decided to get in the spirit by making gameday type foods anyway. Enjoy these jalapeno popper grilled cheeses and finally admit to yourself that you’re only interested in the sport because of Tom Brady… GO PATS!
“…the butlers set the silver domes in from of them. The lights had dimmed, and the lids were whisked away. There, on the plates, Bern saw the tiniest bird carcasses imaginable, browned and glistening with butter. There was a collective gasp; L’ortolan, a woman murmured, her voice thick with longing.”
-Lauren Groff, Delicate Edible Birds
Slow Cooker Caramelized Onions
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_ _ I have the ultimate “grass is always greener” attitude: when it’s summertime and I start sweating on the walk from the front door to my car, I find myself longing for the cozy sweaters and excitement of a first snow… in the winter, when I’m shivering in bed and trying to warm my popsicle toes against my boyfriend’s legs, I think fondly of the warm sun and curse the itchy sweaters and unending sleet. So, since I’m always trying to improve myself (I’m so close to being perfect), I’m going to appreciate the present–carpe diem! These caramelized onions are so delicious on top of summer’s BBQ burgers and if your friends and family try to tell you they look like a certain earth-dwelling invertebrate– tell them you won’t stop singing until they take a taste… “No body likes me, everybody hates me, I’m going out to eat…”
“Lucci was heartened; there was still good in the world, perhaps. Then he smelled a smell that made him heady, crêpes, and he could isolate each of the ingredients as he never could before: butter, sugar, flour, milk, even a little rum. He felt the ground until he found the plate, and pressed his fingers into a soft stack two inches high.”
-Lauren Groff, Delicate Edible Birds
Spicy Sun Dried Tomato Soup and Grilled Cheese with Bacon, Basil and Havarti
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_ _ Delicious. I wish it was cold out so I could let the soup warm me nicely, instead of causing me to wipe the dripping sweat off my face while making it.
Continue reading “Spicy Sun Dried Tomato Zoup… And Sandwiches”
LIFE SHOULD TASTE GOOD... cooking for an army of two 